17 Apr 2012
Cool weather here today. Has only been in the 50s all day. Weird after having hot days in the 80s. Has been kind of a lazy day for Chris and I. Chris has watched tv all day and is watching Andy Griffith right now. We met Jim to eat supper since he had to go on to his delivery tonight and wasn't going to be coming home. Chris did really well today until awhile ago when he came out and said someone was yelling at him and it was making him cry. I told him I wasn't yelling and no one else was here. There is no one around us. We live out in the woods on 35 acres. I told him I didn't hear anyone yelling. He was upset. I wonder what goes on in his head. Did he really hear someone yelling in his head? I mean, he thinks that he heard that but did he or was it just imagination or what? Later, I heard alot of noise coming from his room; sounded like he was moving things around. I went into his room and looked around and couldn't see anything out of place. He did take his dog tag off however which he has been told he can not take off. It has all his information on it and states that he has alzheimers. That's the first time, as far as I know, that he has taken it off since we got it for him. I explained to him that he can't take it off ever. He just looked at me and said he didn't take it off. There was no use to say to him that he did take it off. I put it back on him and said don't ever take it off. It's always something every day. Even on good days, something weird still goes on. So is weird becoming the norm? We have to get up real early to take Mom to Jackson for her appointment. I'm sure I'll have plenty to write about tomorrow. Wednesdays are always an eventful day and not in a good way. 

16 Apr 2012
Today was a much better day. I still have some pain but it's much better than the last two days. I was actually able to get some sleep last night. Chris has had a great day. He has been very focused on everything and has been funny and clever and happy happy happy! Thank you God for such a great day. When I talked to Mom, she had her little weirdness that she always has but I was able to take it in stride and not stress over it. Woohoo! I just love it when Chris is happy and content. He brightens my days so much. I am truly blessed to have Chris as my brother. He is such a blessing in our lives. Every day he brings a whole new perspective to everything. Chris is watching Andy Griffith right now with our little cat, Orville. Chris said today that Orville sticks to him like glue. He told me that Orville keeps him warm at night. Orville does follow Chris around everywhere and does stay right with him. So sweet. Good night everyone! Sweet dreams!  

15 Apr 2012
I'm so glad this day is at an end. It has been stressful and I have felt like crap all day. I don't think I have a hernia but I think I have pulled a muscle and it is making my back hurt where I hurt it last July whitewater rafting. My God, I don't need this at all. How am I going to get everything done that I need to? At least I don't have to take Mom to the doctor until Wed so maybe it will be better then. Chris has had a happy day today. He ate good and was cheerful, laughing, and enjoyed watching movies all day. I think he was so happy because Jim was home all day today. He really misses Jim when he is gone. They like to pick on each other and tease each other. Chris went to bed smiling and happy. Sweet dreams Chris! Until tomorrow.....

15 Apr 2012
Well, I didn't get to blog last night because I went to bed early. That never happens but I did something really stupid. I was in Chris' room helping him with his tv and I was bent over kind of weird and I coughed and I felt a terrible pain down in my abdomen, lower left side. It hurt for a long time and I was so afraid I had a hernia. I don't know even now, it might be a hernia. It hurt most of the night and is hurting some now. I don't feel any bulge or protrusion so I'm hoping maybe its just a pulled muscle though thats not good either. I don't have time to get hurt or be sick. Its hard enough just dealing with my kidney and bladder disease. Oh well, enough of that. Chris is having his head pains today. I'm calling the neurologist again in the morning and get an appt for Chris. Its not right that he keeps having those head pains. Its almost crippling for him because he has to sit down or lie down until it passes. If the doctor says that he has to have the shunt put in, ugh! If it helps him then thats what we will do but I just hate the thought of Chris having to go through that. My sweet boy. He just doesn't deserve any of this and today is one of those days that I'm having difficulty dealing with this wicked disease. On the upside though, we are having a very good sunday dinner. Stuffed cheese tortilleni with italian sausage, spaghetti, homemade garlic herb bread, and fruit salad. :) I better get started on the bread. It takes forever to make but is worth it when you take it out and it smells so good and tastes so good. lus, it makes the house smell good and homey.

13 Apr 2012
Well, its certainly been a friday the 13th kind of day. Chris and I went to the post office to express mail Moms tax papers because she is the worst procrastinator ever lol. We then went to Wal Mart to get medicine and some neccessities. My Mom has a panic button "Lifeline" and they called me saying that she had pushed the button that she wears around her neck and they called her house and there was no answer. We finally got that taken care of; she was fine. Her nurse was there and they couldn't get the machine to stop squawking so they keppt pushing the button thinking it would stop. Hmmm; when the company called me they said they were calling 911 and have someone go to her home and I told them her nurse was there so it must be something going on with the machine. Anyway.......it was all drama with her and I told her that they got it to stop and not to worry about it but it was all she could talk about. It's not really that funny yet it is. As for Chris, he did pretty good today. Had a few head pains and was more tired than usual today but by late afternoon was feeling good. We met my husband for supper; he had to head on to KY tonight with work. Chris sure does love my husband. Everytime the phone rings, Chris always asks me if it was Jim. He also asks me a million times a day when Jim is going to be home. When I tell him that Jim is going to be out in the truck overnight, Chris does not like that at all. It's really a wonderful thing to see how Chris has bonded with Jim. Chris needed a male figure in his life so badly. We have been working in Chris' activity books and he is doing really good with them. He had forgotten so much that he had learned in school and some of it is coming back to him now. He also is reading his Bible every day and that is so good for him too. Tonight, when I tucked him in bed, he told me to look beside him and there was our little cat, Orville, sound asleep. Chris had tucked Orville in under the covers. It was so cute. Orville sticks to Chris like glue. Our big cat, Homer, then came into the room and got up on the bed beside Chris and Orville and settled in. Chris started laughing really hard and said "Oh no, not two cats!" I told Chris good luck with that lol! I just love to hear Chris laugh and to see him so happy and content. Makes everything worthwhile and brings me such joy. These are the moments :)

12 Apr 2012
Today was stressful and towards the evening I felt very overwhelmed but talked to my husband and feel better now. I was cleaning the family room; dusting, sweeping, and moving furniture around alittle, and I saw that Chris was looking out his room watching me. I smiled and waved at him and he didn't smile. He looked mad or upset. I asked him if he was alright and he asked me why did I turn all the electricity off. His tv was on and he was watching Scooby Doo so I went in and turned his light on and said see, the power is on hon. He was not convinced even though I had his lights on, the tv was on, and I turned on his ceiling fan. He also asked me why I was moving everything out of the house. I realised that his confusion had to do with me doing something as simple as moving the furniture around. It hit me that something so simple, so common could confuse him so much and the realization of this disease overwhelmed me so much it hurt. You go through days with not much happening and then bam! I felt helpless, stressed, sad, and worn out. Imagine what Chris must feel. Tonight, Chris was in a very good mood and even watched American Idol with Jim and I. He was happy, cheerful, and ate good. He even ate dessert. :) I'm now heading to bed for some much needed rest and it starts all over again in the morning. I'm thankful for another day no matter what it might bring. Appreciate the good moments, handle the bad, and always keep your chin up!

11 Apr 2012
Where to begin? Well, every wednesday I take my Mom to the wound center at the hospital to have her dressings changed due to diabetic ulcers. Ofcourse, I take Chris with us and two people on walkers can be difficult and almost comical. Today, Mom acted like a child and didn't even seem to be concerned regarding anything to do with Chris. Some days its just almost to weird and bizarre to even deal with. I think she gets jealous when I'm dealing with Chris and taking care of him. I know this blog is basically about Chris and his alzheimers but this is also part of our journey. I'm taking care of two children; my 87 yr old mother and my brother. Some days I am so beat and exhausted that I can't even think straight. I get home and I just sit and vegetate. Chris did really good today, thank God. He did have his more and more common "brain freeze" but the doctor said that at this point it could just be cluster headaches due to the chemical changes occurring with the alzheimers. My sweet sweet brother. He has such a positive attitude with everything in life. He brings me such joy. He also is so wise in so many ways. He understands that Mom has her weird ways and he has so much insight on how to handle everything. I wish I were that patient and wise. I think the Serenity Prayer could be my anthem. I have got to accept the fact that I can't change so many things and I have got to learn to deal with that. Okay, enough. I guess I've vented enough for now. Tomorrow is a brand new day with a brand new set of problems and a brand new set of joyful moments.